samswittyusername:

the-mice-that-started-it-all:

ireallylikegaryoldman:

You know what this adultery needs? SANDWICHES.



I’m quitting this website

samswittyusername:

the-mice-that-started-it-all:

ireallylikegaryoldman:

You know what this adultery needs? SANDWICHES.

I’m quitting this website

(via mrs-khs)



katara:

98% of my life is ????? with a little ¿¿¿¿¿

(via sniffing)


(via sniffing)


suspend:

why are boys hot and cute like wtf take a break

(via fake-mermaid)


firelorcl:

fact: your dick changes colours depending on your mood

(via zackisontumblr)


if my jokes offend you:

  1. i’m sorry
  2. it won’t happen again
  3. 1 & 2 are lies 
  4. you’re a pussy

(via fake-mermaid)


literalsame:

I HTAE BEING A TEENAGER I ALWAYS EITHER WANT TO THROW MYSELF OUT A WINDOW OR CUDDLE WITH CUT E PERSON OR EAT A COW

(via fake-mermaid)


teatattoo:

SHOWERS ARE FUCKING INCREDIBLE. OH UR SKIN FEELS STICKY? SHOWER. HAIR A LITTLE GREASY? SHOWER. NEED TO ESCAPE YOUR FAMILY? SHOWER.

(via fake-mermaid)


fiftyshadesofstyles:

i have never laughed so hard in my life

fiftyshadesofstyles:

i have never laughed so hard in my life

(via mrs-khs)


kushdrinker:

how to give a handjob:

1. grab boner mid-shaft

2. pump until confetti is released

3. party

(via sniffing)


inbox:

why do teapots scream like wtf shut the hell up you piece of shit

(via fake-mermaid)


beinggigantic:

beinggigantic:

beinggigantic:

did u guys see the deer with the ribbon

image

this one did u see it

did u see this

(via michisback)



mrs-khs:

smartymartyfy:

mrs-khs:

penderttoni:

mrs-khs:

To the anon that wanted selfies of me smiling. I took these at a red light xD

Molly, you should be driving, shame

But it’s worth it because you have a pretty smile

Hey! I was stopped! Dalton please don’t take my example

Hey careful. Who will my gf have to talk to when she’s in class if you get into a car wreck?

Lol awww

(via mrs-khs)